Day 2

I should have wrote a post around 3am when I woke up suddenly from the sound of Mr. IM’s phone dropping, however, I though I was being shot at. I guess those pills lead to some crazy dreams. And I’m not going to lie, I didn’t end up taking the pill until 9:28pm….way after I posted that I did. I was making myself sick to my stomach, thinking this is what it has come down to, medicine. Since I was up, might as well go on Facebook, right? I hop on and come a cross this:

Notes From a Dragon Mom http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/16/opinion/sunday/notes-from-a-dragon-mom.html?src=tp&smid=fb-share&_r=0 Just when I think my world is crashing down around me, I read something like this. It’s a sign. Whether things will get better or ways will be parted, it’s nothing compared to what this mother and so many other mother, fathers, family and friends are going through living and loving to the end of a terminally ill childs life.

9/19/10  A dear friend sent me an email with a link to this website Goop.com and told me to read the article under “Be”  Bryce Dallas Howard about Postpartum Depression. Gwyneth Paltrow wrote about her experience, “I was confronted with one of the darkest and most painfully debilitating chapters of my life….postnatal deprssion.” She wanted to learn more about and had a doctor describe the condition, advice from a psychologist, the most touching piece by Bryce Dallas Howard, and the ‘it doesn’t get more real than this’ blogger Heather B. Armstrong’s website dooce.com.

I scoured dooce.com, reading the ‘about’ page, searching postpartum depression, desperately searching for validation that it’s ok to ask for help. All this before my appointment yesterday. I wanted to go into the appointment having an understanding or having done some ‘research’ on postpartum depression. I can across the her post For those who live with those like me where her husband Jon shares his experiences the second time around with baby #2 and by far the most eye-opening piece I’ve read in a long time, is his perspective on what it’s like to live with someone who suffers from chronic depression, How I Do. I only hope this finds Mr. IM, who doesn’t know I’ve started this blog, before it’s too late. This piece gives me hope, that we’re not alone, there is help out there, and it’s going to be hard work but most importantly our son needs happy and healthy parents.

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